Whoopee
My kids just got a whoopee cushion and are now busy mastering the flatulent arts. It’s no longer safe to sit anywhere.
Closet
At my house we have a closet under the stairs. The door to it is in the back of another closet. It’s like Harry Potter’s room. It’s where my kids have secret meetings.
I crawl in there twice a year, once to get the Christmas stuff, and later to put it away again. But I’m not sure I’ll be able to find anything this year.
You see, I just caught a glimpse in there and the floor is covered with 6 inches of pure mess. The closet has become a black hole for junk, an archeological midden, the sewer bottom for missing toy pieces and socks and books. I know how King Augeas felt.
Hope there’s no pizza in there.
Baby snake
My daughter caught a snake this morning. It’s a baby gopher snake and it’s the third we’ve found in the yard over the past year. So we were at a pet store this afternoon and I asked if they had frozen mice. The store employees were horrified. Apparently it’s a vegetarian kind of pet store.
I should have asked if I could buy a baby hamster.